“I watch the Superbowl for the commercials,” is the new “I don’t own a television.” Yes, we’re devolving.
Herman Cain endorses Gingrich. No two candidates have done more to make so-so husbands look like real finds.
I have a vision for America: let’s build a moon colony where we can keep Newt Gingrich.
It’s surprising to hear a politician as homophobic as Rick Santorum say the word ‘mandate’ out loud.
Concordia survivors were offered 30% off their next cruise. If the captain would’ve punctured the inflatable lifeboats, they’d get half off.
Pat Sajak admitted he’s hosted Wheel of Fortune drunk. This is also a good strategy for watching the show.
NBA, it’s good to be back.
Mitt Romney seems like a great candidate, until he fires you.
Sign: SIR ISAAC NEWTON DISCOVERS THE LAW OF DEPRAVITY. Apple falls on NEWTON, he rises, screams and pummels the tree. CURTAIN #tp148